before business study -

just because it's a suffocating feeling today.
[this isn't meant to be brilliant;]

___________

I stare at the floor alot.
People must think that I
Find my shoes to be the most
Interesting of things.

My laces are stale, I know
You wouldn't want to hear about
That, but it's true.
I hide the laces inside my shoe
To prevent a scrape on my right
Knee to match the left, another
Mistake rendered careless while
I knew the kids were secretly
Laughing.

Those laughs. They're pretty.
Their faces, however, feel sad.
But let me be apart of smart laughter
Angst ridden, bitter laughter at
The unfairness of the world, instead
Of hoping I'm not an unwanted
Center of attention.

Oh hey, I've found my laugh!
Center of attention. Give me my little
Corner, my category, a sticker from
3rd grade telling me just how special
And loved you could all make me feel.
Not just tossed to the side, a corner
I do not like.

The corner seat, the edge of the bus,
In which you don't look me in the eye
Anymore, and laugh with girlier laughs
Than I can make.
And when you can't stand to see me
Anymore,
I look to my shoes.